Van Waffle: Reinhilde Cammaert Scholarship Winner 2021

Van Waffle

As a 2020 Reinhilde Cammaert Scholarship winner, Van had the opportunity to work one-on-one with his mentor, David Brock, on a novel.

The Reinhilde Cammaert Memorial Scholarships are generously suppported by Bieke and Thanasis Stengos.


Can you summarize the project you worked on with your InkWell mentor?

I had nearly completed a first draft of a novel a few years ago. I thought it had strong possibilities but it was not ready to show to an agent or publisher. During the program my mentor and I looked over several chapters in detail. During each session he suggested exercises for me to try before our next meeting.

What were the goals you set out for the program?

My main goal was to bring it close to the point where it would be ready to approach a publisher. I looked for advice on what did and didn’t work well, dialogue, pacing, descriptive writing, and finding the right level of humour to lighten the subject.

What were the toughest challenges you encountered?

I’m a gay man and a survivor of conversion therapy. The novel was inspired by that traumatic experience. I don’t know how I wrote the first draft so quickly years ago. During the scholarship program whenever I set aside time to work on it, suddenly everything else became more important, pressing, or interesting. It took all my willpower to stop distracting myself from the feelings that bubbled up from working on the novel. I find that once I open the document and start looking at it, then it becomes fascinating and absorbing. Unpleasant feelings can and should fuel the writing. I just have to press through that stubborn gate of myself.

What was most surprising about the process?

I was surprised to find how much of the material my mentor liked. There are lots of things I can do to improve it, of course, but most of all the process lifted my confidence about the work.

What are some self-care activities you have been engaging in?

Journal writing every day is vital to my self-care. Somewhere I read that 750 words is optimal to press past inner resistance so that’s what I aim for. It takes me about 40 minutes. I try to do it before breakfast or immediately after. Journal writing can be a great pleasure, but when I need to vent, worry, and whine, the journal gets it out my system. Then I can approach creative writing without being distracted by all those real and imaginary problems.

What’s next for you?

Since the scholarship I’ve done a lot of adding and subtracting to the manuscript. Recently I decided the framework is good: I have most of the chapters and scenes I want. Now it needs to be thoroughly revised, which requires many passages using the voice I have now. I won’t ask for advice during this phase because it’s time to trust myself. My mentor pointed out that I’m a process writer. I don’t know what that means exactly. It’s satisfying when I’m in the flow. I’m not a perfectionist but I think it means I can always find room for improvement. Soon I will have say, “It’s enough,” and let it go.


Van Waffle is a journalist, author, and poet with particular interests in the environment, food, and mental health. He lives in Waterloo, Ontario, and blogs at vanwaffle.com.